The Crafty Fifty Meme, Part One

Stolen from Sunday Stealing.

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. Introduce yourself.
"But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis persona. Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V." Just kidding, my name is David.

5. Did you ever get into a bar and drink before you were 21?
Tons starting at 18 on.

6. What countries have you been to?
Not many, Germany, Mexico, The Dominican Republic and of course the good 'ole US of A.

7. Do you watch MTV anymore?
No. I've haven't watched MTV since they stopped showing music videos.

8. What do you think about Oprah?
I don't. The only cool thing about Oprah is that she lives in Chicago.

10. You need a new pair of jeans: what store do you go to first?
Express.

11. Did you ever watch The O.C.?
No, I'm not a twelve year old girl.

12. What kind of car do you drive?
A POS.

13. Honestly, is that car insured?
Of course I'm insured, it's the law. The drunk asshat that hit me and made my last car a total loss did not have insurance.

14. Do you like sushi?
Love it.

15. Have you ever been to Tiffany & Co. or Saks 5th Ave?
Yes to both.

16. Did your parents spoil you growing up?
Of course.

17. Do you like roller coasters?
No way. I always think I'm going to be the "lucky" rider to go hurling off the tracks a thousand feet off the ground, ala Final Destination 3.

18. What magazine(s) do you buy regularly or subscribe to?
None now, I used to subscribe to Entertainment Weekly and Men's Health forever.

19. Do you remember the old WB show “Popular”?
What's the WB?

20. When you go out do you prefer to go to a dance club or to a bar?
Depends on my mood, I like both.

21. What do you think about gay marriage?
I believe gays deserve to be just as miserable as everyone else.

22. Who do you think will be the next president?
Obama.

23. Are you registered to vote?
Of course, I registered on my 18th birthday.

24. Do you own an iPad?
Nope.

25. Is your bathroom filled with beauty stuff?
Only when I enter it!