Extreme Couponing

So I was watching "Extreme Couponing" earlier today while eating lunch.  Yeah I know, I really need to get a life, but like a train wreck, I had to stop and take a peek.  This woman was loading up on a bunch of shit at the grocery store with the goal of paying little or nothing with the help of coupons and store discounts.  I even saw one women get a credit! 

Kind of a cool concept if you want to load up on a hundred bags of Cheetos, or fifty boxes of cat food, or any other useless garbage to ingest.  What really left me flabbergasted was after one shoppers triumph she commented along the lines of the following:  (I'm paraphrasing) "I just don't understand why anyone would go hungry when I just bought 3,000 dollars worth of groceries for under 50 dollars."

The fuck?

On the very few occasions when I've caught bits and pieces of this show I've hardly ever seen much worthwhile that anyone would need to buy in bulk.  I guess what I'm wondering from anyone out there that takes couponing to the extreme, do you every buy anything that you really want or need?  Even for light couponers, do you tend to buy items that you might otherwise skip because you happened upon a coupon in the Sunday paper? 

I guess on the plus side some people do this in order to donate their haul to local food banks, etc.  An admirable goal but still, I think a soup kitchen would be better served receiving goods with a higher food value.  Admittedly I could be wrong about what kinds of items people are snagging since it's not something I'm want to watch regularly.  Though, I've yet to see an extreme couponer loading up on a ton of fresh fruits and vegetables.

America.

Something to Bitch About

The best thing about having a blog is having a place on the Internets to rant! I had a few things to bitch about so I thought I would combine them into one blog posting:

Willard Romney and all his day one promises. Off the top of my head he's said that he's going to repeal the Affordable Care Act, end regulations on businesses, get tough with China, initiate tax cuts, and approve the Keystone Pipeline. I'm sure there's more that he's promised but I don't have an Etch A Sketch in front of me to predict the future.

What's allegedly off limits with Willard Romney. I'm tired of hearing from politicians and their surrogates what's off limits, or should be off limits during the Presidential campaign (Obama does this too). Apparently with the Romney campaign his tax records, his religion, and his work at Bain Capital should be off limits to scrutiny and attack. Really? So I guess all we have to put under the microscope for Romney is his work on the Winter Olympics (by the way, the U.S. Winter Olympic clothing was made in Burma) and his four years as Governor of Massachusetts, where his biggest legislative accomplishment is very similar to President Obama's biggest accomplishment, health care reform. What bugs me the most is the issue of his religion and the lack of discussion about it. Mormons are batshit crazy, though in fairness, I think most religions are batshit crazy anyways.

Adult Swim live action shows. In general I love Adult Swim at night on the Cartoon Network but the live action shows have got to go! Childrens Hospital, NTSF: SD: SUV::, Eagle Heart, and the ultimately craptastic Eric and Andre Show. Someone must be watching these shows as they're still getting produced but I just can't stomach them.

Everyone being outraged by Chick-fil-A. The news of their homophobia and overall douchebaggery is nothing new! This shitty company has been on my banned list for a long, long time. Oh and while we're at it, yay for the Muppets!

The Boy Scouts of America. Same as with Chick-fil-A.

New Leaf Florist. I had some flowers delivered to my house this morning which is a nice thing but damn if New Leaf Florist isn't persistent in getting them delivered. They banged very loudly on my door twice and called me twice at 8:30AM in an attempt to get me to the door. Just leave the delivery on the porch for Christ's sake! I was a little grumpy since I woke up in the middle of the night and didn't get back to sleep until around 5AM...

The gun control debate. Why is it that when we have some kind of gun shooting tragedy in this country it's always too early to talk about gun control and putting limits on the purchasing of ammunition? It's exactly the right time to have this debate! I'm all for rednecks owning their precious guns but I think it's time to talk (again) about limiting what kind of guns said rednecks should be able to purchase. I'm not sure the founding fathers ever intended the Second Amendment to include weapons that could release 100 rounds from a magazine in 30 seconds. I guess I could be wrong, I'll leave such discussion to the experts, like the NRA.

Rachael Ray. She's always on my list of things to bitch about. She's the spawn of Satan and must be stopped.

Must See TV

I have to admit I'm not a huge fan of television. Sure my TV is on more often than not when I'm at home but usually it's just background noise while I'm reading or doing something else. There's rarely a show that I absolutely must catch on first airing, thanks mostly to the Internet. Lately I've found myself glued to a few shows, meaning more than one at a time, amazingly enough. I thought I would compose a list of what I'm watching and what I think television has to offer that's good recently. I also need to preface my list by saying that there isn't anything worth watching on the networks, namely ABC, NBC, CBS, and FOX. Expanded cable and premium cable offer so much better stories that I've found it impossible to watch anything on the big 4. I mean there's no nudity, cursing, and barely watered down adult themes!

The Walking Dead: I've pretty much given up Sunday Funday lately just to watch the offerings on Sunday night on AMC. That's saying a lot! Though the first half of the second season just ended it still makes my list of what everyone should be watching now. Current episodes can be found and watched online as well as On Demand. The latest slate of episodes were a little uneven especially compared to last season, but it's still one of the best and most unique shows on TV right now. It's a worthy watch for no other reason than to contemplate how people would really react if indeed a zombie apocalypse were to happened. The themes of morality versus survival are heavy this season and it really makes one wonder how they would behave in such a dire environment.

American Horror Story: The only show I've watched religiously on FX. Airing on Wednesday night, the show is the story about a couple and their daughter who move to L.A. and move into the locally famous "murder house." Gruesome death scenes preface each episode from different eras of the nearly 100 year old house where those who have died are doomed to remain on the premises. Exceptional actors and bloody special effects makes American Horror Story a must watch. Though a little over the top, the stories abound with nudity, sex, and violence, all good things! Definitely a mind fuck from week to week but that's what keeps me coming back for more, just to see where the hell the story is going to veer off to.

Hell on Wheels: Another gritty new series by AMC on Sunday nights. It's pretty much the story of the transcontinental construction (say that three times) of our railway system. It's a western that tackles themes of the encroachment of civilization to native areas, political palm greasing, and the complications of the end of the Civil War. I'm still withholding judgement on the show but I'm liking what I see so far. Man I really miss Deadwood!

Top Chef: In its 9th season, Top Chef is still a must watch for me on Bravo on Wednesday nights. The series has lost a little bit of it's spice over the years but it's still a well done series with plenty of drama and culinary contests. It's one of the few shows I tune in to season after season and often even blog about, at least I did until I became so lazy here.

Returning shows I'm most exited about:

A Game of Thrones: One of the, if not the best new show on television. The second season is due to return in April on HBO. I came a little late to the party and had to watch the first season online. I did it in one setting. I'm excited to see if the second season follows the second novel as closely as the first season did the first novel. Absolutely not to be missed. Watch the series online or buy it on DVD if you haven't seen it already. I can't imagine anyone not liking this show, especially fans of the series of novels.

Futurama: Good news everyone! Futurama is back on Comedy Central on Thursday night. Though the show is in hiatus right now you can catch a mix of the older episodes as well as the newer ones on Thursday nights. I'm a bit of a Futurama fanatic. I own all of the original episodes on DVD and if I happen to catch the reruns on TV, I usually stop to watch no matter how many times I've seen them. Though the show is not nearly as funny as when it first aired on FOX a decade ago, it's still better than most crap on TV right now. As the writers and actors seem to be getting back in their groove the quality of the show seems to be getting better and better.

So that's pretty much my list of must see TV right now. I'm sure I've missing some terrific shows but I'm somewhat limited by my lack of viewing hours as well as my limited expanded basic cable set up. What's everyone else watching now? What am I missing?

Top Chef: Last Chance Kitchen

Really Bravo?

In another unusual twist to the Top Chef cooking competition, Bravo gives us Last Chance Kitchen. The last person eliminated on the show has the chance to cook one final time to stay in the competition. The goal for the losers is to cook every week against the most recent person eliminated for a chance to get back in the contest at the end and compete for the 125,000 dollars!

This being the first week of Last Chance Kitchen we are treated to Andrew and Janine (the last two chefs out in the qualifying rounds) cooking in a best pizza throw down.

Andrew prevails over Janine and wins a chef coat that he will defend against next weeks eliminated contestant.

The online only Last Chance Kitchen footage can be found here.

When I heard about this final, final cut that Top Chef was offering I rolled my eyes but upon watching the video I think I'm kind of down with the concept. At the very least it will potentially give a good chef who was prematurely eliminated the chance to get back in the finale.

Thoughts or comments?

Top Chef: Sweet Sixteen

I was finally able to catch the second episode of Top Chef: Texas after missing the first run last Wednesday. Luckily Bravo always shows re-runs of all their shows twenty times a week!

This week we conclude the third round of the qualifying challenge as well as the bubble round. In the qualifying round the contestants choose from ten different ingredients on a table with each item having a mystery time for competition which were 20, 40, and 60 minutes. Top Chef always has to put in that little twist.

The bubble round was a little more simple. The chef contestants were asked to just make any dish they wanted with the ingredients in the kitchen. Six chefs were left in the bubble round while only two spots were left on the show. Edward and Grayson were the two last chefs to make it into the competition.

Other observations:

Chaz (mama's boy) sure got a lot of talking time this week. I figured this was a pretty good sign that he would make the cut and be part of the final sixteen but unfortunately he wasn't able to even get his food plated in time. His crush for Padma turned into being crushed by the judges.

I love the line up when everyone is spouting their resumes at their introductions. I was really hoping that one of the contestants would confess to being the day shift team leader at Arby's.

It's cool that Paul made the final cut. He's the food truck guy. I think it will be interesting to have a contestant from a non-traditional food background on the show. Hopefully he'll last.

Speaking of lasting. People who usually never advance very far into this competition, older chefs and private chefs. Case in point this week, Laurent (51) and Jonathan (private chef). I guess Robin did manage to hang around for a while on Top Chef: Las Vegas much to my dismay...

Has anyone ever had ox tail? Just curious. I've eaten a few crazy things in my time but never tail of any land animal.

No Gail this week. Boo. I was going to try really hard to pay attention to her boobs.

Grayson wanted to be a professional drinker at age 15 but went into the restaurant business instead. In my experience the two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive.

I like how Molly defended herself for being a cruise chef and being just as good as the other chefs in the competition. She was promptly sent home on the bubble round for over cooking her shrimp.

Next on Top Chef: apparently a lot of cooking, a lot of crying, and a lot of mother fucking cussing.

Next chef out: since I still don't have a good feel about everyone I'm going to say either Ed or Grayson simply because they had to cook twice to make it into the competition.

Next week predictions: a more traditional Top Chef episode?

For me next week is when the show really begins. I look forward to getting to know, and hate, the chefs in this competition!

Top Chef: Texas!

Dear Top Chef, I really tried to like your Masters edition, All Stars edition, and Just Desserts edition but I just couldn't. Now that we're back to the original format I couldn't be more stoked. Welcome to season nine of Top Chef Texas!

Blogging about Top Chef is always difficult in the first couple of weeks. It takes some time to get to know all of the new contestants. Bravo made things even harder this years starting off with 400 chef contestants. Well not really. Actually they're starting out with 29. After two episodes all of these contestants will be narrowed down to a more traditional number of 16. The first two rounds focused on the first two groups of chefs where they would be rewarded with a chef coat and make the cut to be in the competition, sent home from the competition, or placed on the bubble where they would have to cook yet again for another chance to make the competition. After two rounds we're left with 11 locks for the show and a hand full of cooks left on the bubble. Next week the third group of chefs will compete as well as those left on the bubble. Whew.

Some random musings on the first episode:

Two new celebrity judges join Tom, Padma, and Gail this season, Emeril Lagasse (I can never look at the man again without thinking of Elzar from Futurama) and Hugh Acheson, who is in dire need of an eyebrow specialist. What happend to everyone's favorite sell-out, Anthony Bourdain? Lame.

As soon as chef contestant Tyler Stone opened his mouth in an interview snippet I knew he would be leaving sooner rather than later. They guy was way too cocky not to be sent home early. In fact Tom sent him home before he even had a chance to cook! Note to future contestants: if you can't butcher a pig you probably shouldn't (1) volunteer to do so and (2) be on a cooking competition show.

A couple of chef contestants failed to finish plating their food, costing one a spot in the final 16 and sending another to the bubble round. Have these people not watched an episode of the series before?

According to the opening it appears as though all the cooking competitions will be split between Dallas, San Antonio, and Austin. No love for Houston? And what about my favorite Texas city of all time, Amarillo? A city that's 300 miles long and 1 mile wide...

Is anyone else disappointed that there isn't a contestant named Suck Lord?

I can't remember what Gail was wearing or what her boobies were doing! Hopefully that's not a bad omen of things to come this season!

It looks like Chicago is going to be well represented this season. I eagerly await to see if there's actually anywhere good to eat in Chicago and where those places are located.

Next on Top Chef: more of the same. Two more rounds of potential contestants duking it out for a spot in the final 16.

Next chef(s) out: a ton of them. There are only five spots left in the competition.

Next week predictions: I think it's a little too early for this, let's wait until we have all of our finalists in place.

So far so good with season nine I think. I like the new opening rounds format where the contestants have to cook to get into the competition. The season should be a lot of fun, as you know everything is bigger in Texas (I wonder how often we're going to hear that gem of a line this year?).

Top Chef: Sore Loser

Wild night on Top Chef: All Stars, no? Hopefully this recap won't be too muddled as I was flipping back and forth between Bravo and the Thunder game. Thunder won by the way, woot.

Quick fire challenge: Joe Jonas shows up to explain the challenge, prepare a snack for a group of kids who are camping overnight at the Museum of Natural History. The only catch is that the snack must be prepared in a way where it can be bagged and eaten without plates or utensils. Ugh, my second favorite thing in the world after cats would be kids (sarcasm). Pastry chef Jonas' least favorite snacks were from Tiffany, Stephen, and Mike. Tiffani and Spike are announced the winners via a tie so the final decision is taken to the kids at the museum. All the contestants divide up into teams and help Tiffani and Spike prepare enough portions of their snack for the kid judging. Tiffani's rice crispy treat moon pie concoction beats out Spike's potato and carrot chips with marshmallow dip. Nice call kids. Tiffani earns immunity and an advantage in the elimination challenge.

Elimination challenge: the two teams remain together for the challenge to prepare breakfast for the kids and their parents in the morning after the museum sleep over. The teams choose between a completely meat oriented meal (team T-Rex) or a completely vegetarian meal (team Brontosaurus). Team Brontosaurus wins between the two teams with Marcel, Angelo, and Richard being awarded the best dish with their banana parfait. Dale L. and Tiffani are safe on the losing team while everyone else is up for elimination. After much awkwardness Jen is sent packing for essentially making soggy bacon.

Other thoughts on the show:

While Joe Jonas was participating in the quick fire challenge, Dale T. mentions that he didn't know who he was and at first he thought he was a pastry chef. Translation: who's the gay dude? In Dale's defense, I know who the Jonas brothers are, but I wouldn't be able to pick Joe Jonas out of a line up.

I hated the first half of the show and I really enjoyed the second half. I just don't like the children challenges (I'm such a curmudgeon). Staying overnight at the museum would have been a cool experience. Like some of the contestants I would have opted to roam the museum at night with a flashlight in hand rather than trying to get 45 minutes of sleep. I wouldn't want to risk having bed head the rest of the challenge!

Poor Fabio was the last to get picked when dividing up into groups. I would have picked you Fabio, at least before I picked Stephen...

Angelo already has two wins. Another repeat of last season? Dominate until the final and then we get to see his ass, literally.

Jamie cuts her hand early on during the elimination challenge and goes away to get two stitches. If it were me I would have taped up my finger and carried on thinking that being absent would be a sure fire way of being sent home. Of course there were no real consequences from her leaving. I guess being MIA isn't as bad as soggy bacon.

I forgot to pay attention to Gail's boobies again this week! Me - 0, Gail - 2.

The biggest development on Top Chef this week was the elimination of Jen and her behavior at the judge's table. What a complete and utter ass hat she was when arguing primarily with Tom. It's one thing to defend your dish but she seemed unwilling to take any responsibility that maybe hers just didn't measure up. It was like listening to a four year old, "nope, you're wrong, naner naner!" Her creepy laugh upon hearing the news of her elimination sent a chill down my spine and her off camera Tasmanian Devil tirade after leaving the storage room had me shaking my head and feeling embarrassed for her. Is this the kind of stubborn psycho hose beast you'd want running your kitchen or restaurant? So long crazy.

Next on Top Chef: two contestants eliminated in one episode, it should be good. Will the streak of sore losers continue (see Elia and Jen)? Actually two contestants to leave will be a good thing, there's too many of them to keep up with!

Next chef(s) out: I'm still betting on Stephen and perhaps Tre. After the events of the episode this week who the hell knows.

Next week predictions: Fabio cheeses for the camera and Marcel thinks he's the best chef in the universe.

Fun season thus far! I love that the judges are taking a little lip this time around. What else would you expect from all stars?

Top Chef: All Stars

I totally forgot the eighth season of Top Chef started last Wednesday night. While at work I took some time to watch the first episode of the all star season. It was difficult to find time for it but I sacrificed some Facespace time as well as reading to accomplish it.

Quick fire challenge: divide up into teams from each season and create a dish that best represents the city for that season on Top Chef. Team season 4 ends up winning a deconstructed Chicago dog (sounds yummy). Antonia, Dale T., Richard, and Spike all earn immunity in the elimination challenge with the win.

Elimination challenge: each contestant is asked to improve upon the dish that got them eliminated from their season on Top Chef. Great challenge! Spike, Jamie, Angelo, and Richard create the best dishes, though Richard was not considered for the win since he went over his allotted time while preparing his dish. Angelo wins the first elimination challenge of the season and ten thousand dollars as well. Elia, Fabio, and Stephen land on the bottom with Elia going home for basically making almost the same dish that sent her home in season 2.

Musings on the first episode of season 8:

Since there are contestants from all seven previous seasons it was nice that I knew who everyone was right out of the gate. It's always difficult to get into the first few episodes of a season of Top Chef just trying to get acquainted with all the new faces.

I was surprised the punishment for Richard going over his time limit wasn't more severe. Shouldn't he have been on the bottom three? How often have we seen contestants not finish a challenge and still considered in the top tier? Never. Having said that I don't think he should have gone home, even his incomplete dish in the elimination challenge was probably better than the three on the chopping block. (EDIT: I just realized after posting this that Richard had immunity. D'oh!)

I like Anthony Bourdain a lot so I think it's great that he's a judge this season. He did go a little overboard with his criticism of Fabio's dish and I am in no way a fan of Fabio. Hopefully Bourdain doesn't turn into the new Toby.

I totally forgot to notice what was going on with Gail's boobs this week! I'll have to pay closer attention in the next installment.

Angelo won the first elimination challenge, I wonder if he's going to win a ton of challenges like he did in season 7.

Isabella didn't seem to grind on my nerves too much while watching. We'll see how it goes and I'll without judgement for the time being. It is what it is.

Next on Top Chef: it's hard to tell since the preview showed what was coming for the entire season. Looks like there might be a little drama in there or it could just be the Bravo editing monkeys getting my hopes up, again.

Next chef out: I have no earthly clue since they're all such good contestants. I have to believe Stephen will be making an early exit so we'll pick him. I would also be happy to see Spike and Marcel hit the road sooner rather than later but I'm sure it's not going to happen barring some kind of culinary catastrophe.

Season predictions: I'm not prepared to pick my top three at this point so I'll choose five contestants that I like and will be rooting for to make it far into the competition. In no particular order: Tiffany, Jamie, Dale L., Casey, and Carla. Hopefully Marcel will get his head shaved this season as well!

All in all it looks like it's going to be a fun Top Chef season with the all stars. Hopefully I won't flake out on blogging about it like I did with Just Desserts.

Just Desserts: Bake Sale

I'm really, really digging Top Chef: Just Desserts though I hardly had time to pay attention last night as I was getting bombed by text messages throughout the episode hour. 70+ text in an hour! Really people? Here's my thoughts for this week, at least what I can remember:

Quick fire challenge: create a wedding cake in 90 minutes! Ouch. Even though the cakes were already made, I think this would be a tremendous challenge. I have to be honest most of the cakes were kind of butt ugly. Erika won the challenge and immunity heading into the elimination challenge. Personally I liked the look of Zac's cake the best.

Elimination challenge: divide up into teams and create items for a school bake sale. To be honest this is the bulk of the episode I missed until Judge's table. After a bunch of people being thrown under the bus, Heather C. is sent home for making an ordinary peanut butter cookie.

Other observations:

The beginning of the episode showed us Yigit without his shirt on! I think he should be required to go shirtless throughout the rest of the competition...

Malika fails to finish yet another quick fire challenge. She's weak sauce and I'm surprised that she's still there. Maybe next week.

Heather H. dogging on the other wedding cakes was real classy. She gets under my skin.

It's totally Heather C.'s fault that she was eliminated this week despite the pressure from her team members to make some kind of cookie. She could have stood up to the team made what she wanted or she could have added a little pizazz to her lame peanut butter cookie. As soon as I saw the plain presentation of her contribution to the team I knew she was toast.

Doesn't Danielle look like a poor man's version of Katy Perry? I don't mean that as a complement in any way, shape, or form. She was pretty snarly at judge's table but I didn't mind it so much since she was trying to throw psychopath Seth under the bus.

Next chef out: Danielle or Malika.

Top Chef: Reunion

I usually don't watch the Bravo reunion shows unless on occasion when they involve the Real Housewives of (insert location here). I did watch the Top Chef: DC reunion show last night and I have to say it was kind of fun. How sad that perhaps the reunion show was the best episode of the season! Some thoughts on the show:

My very favorite part of the reunion special: "I's married now!" Tiffany channeling "The Color Purple." I tried to find a clip online from that moment in the movie but alas I failed.

So the great pea puree heist was never fully resolved. I'm of the mind that Alex didn't snatch anyone's food after hearing Amanda and Kelly's testimony that they saw Alex buy peas and make the puree. Odd that it was never caught on film. Kudos to Ed for wearing the pea puree shirt.

Did I miss fan favorite or is it going to be revealed on Watch What Happens Live tonight?

According to Gail, Tom knows how to handle balls. Nice.

Kenny's beast tattoo is a little extreme! He should have just stuck with the shirt. I'll be glad the beast storyline is finally dead, until the next series...

Top Chef: All Stars looks like it might be a lot of fun. Some of the near winners from all the past seasons coming back for a competition.

It was fun to see the contestants and judges in the lighter moments of the series, making them seem more real instead of the raging assholes they appeared to be during the series.
_______________

Is anyone still watching Top Chef: Just Desserts? I'm really digging the show so far. I may try to do a proper recap next week. For now, here are some impressions:

Morgan and Seth form a connection since they're two of the few straight guys in the competition. Give me a break.

Seth is fucking crazy! His meltdown in the kitchen was cringe worthy and embarrassing to watch. He really showed his ass the whole episode going from crazy sad to crazy angry. My friend Matt text me the following message during the show: "He is fucking crazy... I think the devil lives in that lump on his neck..." I laughed my ass off to this!

I like the challenges so far in the series, last night the quick fire challenge was to make a creation using penny candy and the elimination challenge was to make a dessert inspired by liquor and ingredients behind the bar. Who doesn't love a boozy challenge.

I was a little sad to see Tim sent home. He seemed like a nice enough guy. Goodbye mother hen. Why do the gay guys always go out early in these competitions? Fortunately there are a lot more to go on this show...

Next chef out: Malika.

I'm totally not prepared to make a prediction yet on the final four. Maybe next week.

Top Chef: WTF (Again)

So this is the second year in a row that my final Top Chef posting of the season has been titled "WTF." I'm scratching my head wondering why Kevin won the competition. I don't believe he was the best chef contestant in the group but apparently he performed the best when it counted, in the finale! Whatever. No recap this week kiddos, just some random thoughts:

Pretty standard fare for the finale, create a four course meal with certain limitations on what can be prepared in each course. I liked that past winners of the competition were present to be sous chefs for the contestants. I guess they didn't have the budget to fly down the previous contestants from this season!

Kind of cool that Kevin is the first African American to win the competition.

Did anyone else get sick of the side story about Angelo being sick. He kept saying over and over how he didn't want to miss this opportunity by being sick. It just seemed to keep going on and on, blah blah blah.

So a lackluster season of Top Chef comes to an end. While the show did improve somewhat near the end, it wasn't enough to salvage the season! I think season 6 is my overall favorite of the series.

Ed is a dick in the kitchen.

Did anyone watch Top Chef: Just Desserts? It was actually fun and entertaining. Are there any straight guys in the competition? Half the time one of the guys spoke a purse would fall out of his mouth! I think I'll continue to watch and maybe even blog about it. I like Gail Simmons, she seems to be a nicer host than Padma and it looks like the show may have a lot of drama, always fun to watch. Also, it looks like we may already have a villain, Morgan.

So that's it, the end of another season of Top Chef. Thanks for reading everyone. Hopefully next season in the series will be much improved.

Top Chef: Singapore

This is it, the build up to the finale! Once again everyone seemed to cook really well in the quick fire challenge and the elimination challenge. It seems the smallest of margins sent one chef home and elevated the other three for one last challenge.

Quick fire challenge: create Singapore street food using only a wok and local ingredients. Ed wins the challenge with stir-fry noodles with black pepper sauce, lobster and gai lan. I can't believe Ed beat the supposed master of Asian cuisine, Angelo. Though, in Angelo's defense, his chile frog legs with pineapple and rambutan salsa looked very delicious. Ed also won immunity for the elimination challenge securing a place in the final.

Elimination challenge: a team challenge to cater a party based on local cuisine, cooking dishes to order for 80 people. The team agrees to cook one dish each and that all changes when Tom visits the kitchens and pretty much orders them to cook at least two dishes each. Ed seems to be the only contestant prepared for this change of plan. Long story short (I'm not even going to try to remember everyone's dish), Ed wins again and Kelly is sent home by what the judges referred to as a microscopic margin. So the final will consist of Angelo, Kevin, and Ed.

Other observations:

So in the elimination challenge Kelly was making fish head curry but without fish heads? Did I catch that correctly? "Fish heads, fish heads, roly poly fish heads..."

Head chef Tom rags on the team to each create two dishes instead of one in the elimination challenge. It would have been cool if they had banded together and told him collectively to piss off. If a requirement on dishes was necessary it should have been told to the contestants initially.

Was Ed being prepared to create a second dish in the elimination challenge dirty pool? It was a team effort, no? I did love his psychological warfare on Angelo! Does anyone think this elevated him to victory?

Kelly can't open a can, with a can opener? She eludes to Asian cans being different. Is this true? Let's get a ruling from the judges. Timmy? Hello?

It really sucked that Kelly sliced her hand and proceeded to bleed out everywhere. Been there, done that. It always seems to happen at a crazy busy time!

Next on Top Chef: it looks like past contestants (or was it winners?) join the last three contestants left to be their sous chefs. Nifty.

No "Bye Felicia" award this week. I'm fairly satisfied with the remaining three contestants even though I would prefer Kelly in the finale over Kevin.

The next Top Chef is: I'm going with Ed since he's been on such a roll and, based on the preview, it looks like Angelo drank the water!

Edit: I totally forgot to add some quotes:

Kelly - "There is zero room for error."
Ed - "Immunity would definitely help me out."

Wow. Masters of the obvious...

Top Chef: NASA

The episode of Top Chef: DC last night was probably one of the better ones of the season. We seem to be down to five, now four, really good contestants who all made really good food in the elimination challenge. I was thinking, this is what the show should have been all season.

Quick fire challenge: Dana Cowin, publisher of Food & Wine magazine, judges a wine pairing challenge. Pretty straight forward, no off the wall challenge. I like it. Angelo comes out of his funk and wins with a sautéed foie gras with black salt and fennel salad. By winning the challenge he earns a trip to London.

Elimination challenge: create a dish that can be freeze dried and sent into space on a NASA mission. So, a little bit goofy but hey, it's not a baby food challenge, right? The only real criteria is not to make anything too sweet or too compact. The astronauts also mentioned they liked spicy foods and foods from home or comfort food (I never heard this last part but the contestants were talking about it throughout the episode). This week's guest judge, Anthony Bourdain, one of my favorites. Buzz Aldrin is also one of the guest tasters which would be a really cool American icon to meet. Once again Angelo wins with ribs with pea puree and pickled mushrooms, earning a new Toyota, Bourdain's latest book, and a spot to see one of the last two space shuttle launches. Unfortunately Tiffany is sent home for her pan-seared Alaskan halibut with coconut curry.

Thoughts on this week:

I'm a little bummed out by the elimination of Tiffany. She was one of the better (nicer) personalities on the show and she seemed to be cooking really good food of late. I wonder if her mussels hadn't frozen if it would have made a difference. Probably not but I would hate to think she was eliminated due to a refrigeration problem.

Are the prizes out of control this year or what? Money, trips to various destinations around the world, and cars. I think they've definitely topped last season in this regard.

Bourdain was really reserved on the show, not seeming to have too much of a problem with anything the contestants made in the elimination challenge. I liked his rapport with judge Eric Ripert, scolding him for being too snobby on some of the food, in an obviously friendly way.

The Bravo editing monkeys tricked me well this week. I had no clue who was going to go home but I thought for sure that Angelo wouldn't win since there seemed to be a lot of time spent on discussing how sweet his dish was.

Does Angelo pray to the chef gods or to Jeebus? Or does he just thank Jeebus after a win. Well at least he's still not Muslim (I know, I'm wearing that phrase out). Speaking of Angelo, I hope he didn't get crabs from making love to his elimination dish.

The final four is Ed, Angelo, Kelly, and Kevin. Not too bad of a final four, though I would happily trade Kelly or Kevin to keep Tiffany in the mix. I managed to pick two of the top four after the first episode (Angelo and Kevin). I have no clue who is going to win this year! Last year I was certain it would be Kevin but we all saw how wrong that was. I'll make a prediction after we're down to three contestants.

Next on Top Chef: international finale! Was someone snarling at Padma? God I hope so.

My "Bye Felicia" award this week goes to no one! It seems as though Tiffany being sent home was by the narrowest of margins; that makes for great competition television.

Fan favorite? I'm picking Arnold because he moisturizes.

Next chef out: Kevin.

Top Chef: Concession Stand

I just caught the episode from last week of Top Chef: DC this morning. A bit bland but not a bad episode over all. I think the quality of the show has improved as we near the finale but it still isn't nearly as good as other seasons.

Quick fire challenge: choose a food idiom to inspire a dish. Kind of cool, I guess. After an hour cooking Kevin (bring home the bacon) and Ed (hot potato) are determined to have the best dishes by guest chef Rick Moonen. Kelly (sour grapes) and Amanda (the big cheese) finish in the bottom. Ed wins the challenge and will have his dish featured by Schwan's home delivery service. Interesting. I actually laughed out loud when Padma said this was the quick fire challenge prize.

Elimination challenge: create a fine dining version of ballpark food at National's stadium. The challenge consisted of each member working as a team and presenting six dishes. Ed and Tiffany have the best dishes and Ed wins with his shrimp and corn risotto fritters. Everyone left is judged together and Amanda is sent home due to her yellowfin tuna tartar. For his elimination challenge win, Ed received a copy of Moonen's latest book and a trip to Australia!! Wow. G'day Ed.

Other observations:

Yellow really isn't Ed's color. And if he's going to parade around in a dress he really needs to manscape. I guess he can do what he wants since he won the quick fire and elimination challenge this week.

I love how Kelly continues to dump on Amanda's skills yet she finishes in the bottom of both challenges this week. Classy.

I like that Angelo prays to the chef gods. At least he's not Muslim!

Well there was a big to do about nothing on who would take charge and expedite food at the National's stadium. I think Angelo is right, Kevin needs to chill the fuck out and try to be more positive. I bet he's a lot of fun to work with in a busy kitchen.

I hope the ball players washed their hands before feeding each other. Gay.

Did anyone else have the impression that Angelo has a mail order bride in Russia?

Next on Top Chef: NASA food.

My "Bye Felicia" award this week goes to Amanda. I figured she was hitting the road based on how the episode was presented. Tuna tartar sounds good but I would probably balk at eating it if the color was off. Amanda, bye Felicia!

Next chef out: this is getting tough to call. I'm going to pick Kelly since she really, really gets on my nerves.

Top Chef: CIA

The episode of Top Chef: DC was actually kind of bland and drama free for a change.

Quick fire challenge: create a dish from ingredients from a mystery box. Throughout the challenge new boxes with additional ingredients will appear. All of the ingredients from each box must be used. At stake is 10 thousand dollars. In each box:

1. Rock fish, fava beans, and canned hominy.
2. Squid and black garlic.
3. Ramps and passion fruit.
4. Jicama.

Alex and Amanda are in the bottom (big surprise) with Tiffany and Kevin producing the best dishes. Tiffany wins the challenge and the money.

Elimination challenge: create a new identity for a classic dish. The winner receives a trip to Paris. After shopping and prep, the contestants are taken to CIA headquarters to cook for several guests who work for the organization including Director Panetta. In the bottom are Alex, Amanda, and Angelo. The most successful dishes were made by Tiffany, Kelly, and Ed. Tiffany wins the competition and a the trip to Paris while Alex is sent home (goodbye creepy, thank you Jeebus!).

Random thoughts on the episode:

Has anyone cooked with ramps before? I don't even know what they are!

Kevin needs to shut the fuck up about the other contestants, namely Alex, and concentrate on his own cooking. It really, really gets on my nerves when other contestants whine about who shouldn't be around. It's petty and unflattering. It's OK for me to do it because I am petty and unflattering!

It looks like Angelo may not be the man of steel after all.

This is the second time in the competition that Tiffany has won a quick fire challenge and an elimination challenge on the same show. She seems to be getting better as the competition progresses, maybe she'll be the one to beat, she's certainly setting the pace.

I thought it was cool of Tiffany to help Kelly finish plating her dishes in the elimination challenge.

Directory Panetta was called away in the middle of judging the elimination challenge. He probably had to oversee a coup somewhere in South America.

Kelly has never cooked Chinese. Really?

Next week on Top Chef: concession stand food. Sounds fun. Looks like Kevin is still on his little tirade.

My "Bye Felicia" award this week goes to guest judge Wylie Dufresne. Shave and a haircut two bits! Wylie Dufresne, bye Felicia!

Next chef out: Amanda most likely. While she doesn't get on my nerves as much as the majority of the other contestants, her skills are probably the worst of the six remaining.

Two of my top four that I predicted in the first week are still alive in the competition, Angelo and Kevin. To see the original post, click here.

Lame recap this week, I know. The jackasses on the show didn't give me much to work with on this episode!

Top Chef: Restaurant Wars!

Last night was the highly anticipated, at least for me, restaurant wars episode of Top Chef: DC and it was wild. Beware of the recap below, I'm not going to have very good things to say this week...

Quick fire challenge: same as last year, two teams of four members compete in a blindfolded relay of sorts. Each member in turn prepares one dish for the team while the other members are blinded to what is going on until it's their turn. Team Kevin, Kenny, Kelly, and Amanda beat out team Ed, Tiffany, Angelo, and Alex. Alex is blamed for over seasoning the fish, a blaming trend that will continue throughout the episode. The quick fire special guest judge was none other than Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, very, very cool.

Elimination challenge: restaurant wars!! The same teams (we'll call them team Angelo and team Kenny since they both took the lead of their teams) battle it out in a mock restaurant opening. Each team member has to prepare a dish for the restaurant while one member also is responsible for running the front of the house. Team Angelo delegates Alex to front of the house duties and pretty much doesn't let him do anything but prep work, all the while running around like crazy people, apparently highly unorganized. Team Kenny snickers at the other team, really confident that they have the competition in the bag with their calm, cool, and collected demeanor. Naturally team Kenny loses and the leader, Kenny, is sent home for basically making two of the worst dishes.

Thoughts on the episode:

I don't care what anyone says about Nancy Pelosi, I think she's a great Speaker. I believe she single-handedly saved Health Care Reform (such as it is) when Obama was about to give in and begin some major compromises. She's a great leader and exceptional vote getter and counter in the House.

Yes, yes, yes, we get it, Kenny's a beast. It's getting a little old but I guess we don't have to worry about hearing about it any longer.

Though I really don't like Alex, I have to say I kind of felt sorry for him this episode. He not only got dumped on by the opposing team but also his own team. I believe his own team should have let him fully prepare his own dish. If it turned out so terrible like they suspected it would be his ass on the line.

Alex directing the front of the house staff was a bit painful to watch. He was a complete Nazi, or so the Bravo editing monkeys would have you believe. If he was that snotty to me I would have walked out on his ass or taken my shitty wine key and shoved it in his eye.

The team restaurant names were once again stupid this year. Team 2121 wasn't nearly as cringe inducing as team EVOO (extra virgin olive oil). Insert eye roll here.

I'm really disappointed in all the asshattery that went on last night. No contestants endeared themselves to me with the shady way they all ganged up on Alex. Kenny was especially bad when he complained to the judges that it should have been Alex on the cutting block and not his team. Suck it up and own the terrible food you made cry baby. Kevin was also just as bad with his temper tantrum in the dry storage holding area. If I was Alex I would have slapped him in the face like the little bitch that he is. Even Tiffany, someone I was really starting to dig, was being a complete hag.

I think Amanda may be my current favorite contestant, how sick is that? By the way, what is that just above her upper lip? A beauty mark or a herpe? If it's a cold sore, how terrible to get to share that on national television!

Next week on Top Chef: cooking for Leon Panetta and the CIA. Could be fun.

My "Bye Felicia" award goes to all the chefs. They all deserve to be sent home for their general lack of professionalism and douschebaggery! Chefs, bye Felicia, it's your turn to be thrown under the bus.

Next chef out: most likely Alex but I'm to the point where I don't really care. I think I hate them all. In fact I think they should all whip up a batch of poisoned Flavor Aid and commit mass suicide...

Top Chef: Food Around the World

I skipped Top Chef: DC last night since Man v. Food was in Oklahoma City. It was kind of a let down, two of the restaurants that Adam visited I have never heard of! Anyhoo, I was able to catch Top Chef this morning at work online.

Quick fire: Marcus Samuelsson, winner of the last season of Top Chef: Masters is the guest judge this week. The challenge is simple, create a dish inspired by Ethiopian food. I love this challenge and I love the fact that most of the contestants don't know anything about Ethiopian food. Amanda, Angelo, and Tiffany have the top dishes with Tiffany winning.

Elimination challenge: Jose Andres helps judge dishes inspired by countries around the world. The contestants draw knives to determine what order they will pick their countries. They are required to prepare one hundred servings and they will not have access to a kitchen, meaning they will have to prepare everything in advance and serve using sterno to heat in chafing dishes. Kelly, Kevin, and Tiffany are in the top with Tiffany winning again. She also wins a ten thousand dollar bonus! Finally Stephen is sent home having the least successful dish (doing my little happy dance).

Random thoughts on the show:

Little was made of the great pea puree fiasco of last week. Fucking Bravo.

Kevin continues his yo-yo approach to cooking, going back and forth from top to bottom in challenges.

Why was everyone so afraid of being left with Brazilian food? In fact I'm surprised by their lack of knowledge in several types of food. I've eaten Brazilian, Indian, and African food several times, even here in Gooberville.

Could there be a better bottom three than Alex, Stephen, and Ed? Too bad they couldn't all go home!

Of course Angelo knows how to cook Ethiopian food! Is there anything he doesn't know or can't do. I was shocked he was able to cook anything not Asian influenced. Naturally he picked Japan for the elimination challenge.

Next week on Top Chef: restaurant wars!! Finally. Based on the preview (I know that means very little) it could be pretty ugly. Yay!

My "Bye Felicia" award this weeks goes to Stephen. The judges were correct to give him the boot for poorly cooked rice and beef. I love how he added chimichurri to a Brazilian dish too, idiot. Stephen, bye Felicia, you won't be missed.

Next chef out: if we can get rid of Alex I'll be pretty happy with the remaining contestants.

Top Chef: The Great Pea Puree Heist

I caught the encore showing of Top Chef: DC last night at 10PM simply because there wasn't anything else on television to watch and I wasn't especially tired. I'm actually glad that I tuned in, the episode was a little better than the last couple of efforts.

I liked the quick fire challenge. Aaron Schock, a Republican representing the 18th district in Illinois, explains to the contestants that the first day on the job a Congressman must go through an ethics class. What this has to do with food is that a Congressman can only have food purchased for him that is small enough to fit on a toothpick. Thus the challenge, create a satisfying snack that will fit on a toothpick. Once again Angelo wins another quick fire with a duo of tuna. Not only did he win immunity in the elimination challenge but also a 20 thousand dollar reward. I really thought Stephen was going to win the money since he really believed he was!

Elimination challenge, draw knives for a protein to be served at Palm Steakhouse, the first time they've loaned their kitchen out to anyone. This is where all the drama starts with Ed's pea puree. Apparently he had prepped it the night before and the next day during the competition the puree mysteriously disappeared. Alex ends up winning the challenge with smoked salmon with black forbidden rice and English pea puree! A puree he supposedly prepped during the day of the competition. Andrea is sent home for her swordfish vanilla bean dish, oh and because she can't cook.

Other random thoughts on the episode:

Joe Scarborough was one of the tasters at Palm along with other journalist and Republican Senator Mark Warner. Though I would consider myself very liberal, I've always like Scarborough, a definite conservative. I like his ability to call bullshit on conservatives from time to time, basically not towing the party or philosophical line all the time.

Chef Art Smith was also one of the guest judges. His whole cooking from the heart routine wears me a little slick.

I love how Kelly refused to share her salt with Amanda and then proceeds to get busted to the bottom ranks for over salting the steaks she prepared. Apparently she was trying to produce "strong flavors." Yep, a shit ton of salt will get you a strong result. Karma's a bitch hag Kelly! Oh and Amanda's revenge is a dish best served cold (old Klingon proverb).

Stephen was especially cringe worthy this week and seemed to be featured a ton in interviews. I thought the Bravo editing machine was preparing us for his departure but alas his dream continues.

So what does everyone think of the pea puree fiasco? I totally think that Alex stole Ed's puree but who can really say with the editing. I don't remember ever seeing Alex making it on the day of the elimination challenge. Maybe further episodes will reveal more.

When are they going to bring in some Democrat guests?

Next week on Top Chef: I can't even remember the promo. Restaurant Wars has to be coming soon, no?

My "Bye Felicia" award this week goes to Alex. Cheaters never prosper. Alex, bye Felicia! On a personal note I wasn't too upset that Andrea was sent packing.

Next chef out: Stephen please, please, please, please.

Top Chef: Bore Wars

I finally got around to watching last week's episode of Top Chef: DC. I was totally unmotivated to watch last Wednesday as I had my butt planted at my desk at home listening to music and drinking beer. I really don't care much for the remaining whiners or most of the challenges this year. Hopefully that will turn around but I'm afraid it may already be too late. Some thoughts on the show:

The quick fire challenge was simply to cook with some ingredients that are not commonly used in restaurants, I guess in America? Snake, crocodile, frog legs, duck testicles, that sort of thing. The contestants drew knives to see what order they would pick their proteins. After some whining the time starts. But wait, there's a twist! Fifteen minutes into the challenge the contestants are instructed to take the protein from the person to their left. Bummer, eh? More whining from the contestants ensues. Get over it Angelo, this kind of bullshit has always been part of the show. Kelly ends up winning with an Emu egg omelet and has immunity for the elimination challenge.

I was actually looking forward to the elimination challenge this week based on the previews from last week. All the contestants were divided into two teams where they were to prepare a cold dish to present in their "Cold War." The interesting part is that each team would be at judges table and would pick a top and bottom chef to be considered for the win and elimination. I thought there would be a little more nastiness than there was but it seems each team did the right thing and truly picked the best and worst dishes. Tom did chide one of the teams for being overly picky but that was about it for the drama. Tiffany and Kevin end up in the top and Kevin wins the elimination challenge reversing his fortunes of late. Tamesha and Kenny end up at the bottom much to both of their chagrins. Tamesha is sent home.

Thus ends another dull episode with contestants I don't really care about. As of now I think the only contestant I kind of like is Tiffany.

Tamesha really got on my nerves this week after she was kind of growing on me! When she says things like "there's no way I'm being sent home," you know she's toast. I really hope she doesn't kiss her mama with that mouth. She went out acting like an ass, or so the editing would lead us to believe.

I think next season on Top Chef (Des Moines?) they should take all the first and second round losers and put them up against each other. I bet it would be more fun to watch than the current season.

Next week on The Real World, I mean Top Chef: Restaurant wars? Could be fun, usually one team is a total disaster and it can be fun to watch the meltdown.

Two things I'm sick of that don't endear the contestants to me: the constant whining and the lack of humility. I'm talking to you Kenny. I'm sorry but your food looked like ass this week, there's no conspiracy out to get you! Get over yourself and cook better food.

My "Bye Felicia" award this week goes to the producers of the show for picking such a motley crew of contestants this year. Maybe we were just spoiled last year by some pretty fantastic chefs. Producers, bye Felicia!

Next chef out: for the love of all that is holy Stephen must go!
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After proofreading the post, I'm really sorry about the complaining this week! I think it just typifies how disappointed I am in a show that I usually enjoy...

Top Chef: Crabs and Duck Lovin'

I very nearly switched over to Futurama last night during the beginning of Top Chef: DC. Is this season kind of sucking or is it just me? In any event, on to the recap...

Quick fire challenge: prepare a meal using fresh (live) blue crabs. Once again there was much whining from the contestants about the challenge, mostly about not knowing how to get the meat out of the crab or being accustom to working with larger crabs. These are the top chefs of America?

In a snippet from one of Angelo's interviews he said he had crabs once! Are the producers writing or encouraging this shit? Sometimes what they say doesn't feel real. Speaking of Angelo I did like how he helped Tamesha with cleaning her crabs. Strategy or is he genuinely being nice?

Kenny is a beast (in the kitchen). How do I know this? It was said ad nauseum throughout the episode.

Ed ends up winning the quick fire challenge. Ed? Is he new to the show? A mid-season replacement? I'm kidding. Ed's most endearing quality is his loathing of Alex. Ed also states in his interview that he's coming out of his shell. Har har, get it he won a crab contest. Seriously is some producer telling them what to say.

Every commercial break features Bethenny Getting Married promos. Does anyone give two shakes of a dead rats ass? If I was married to that crazy bitch I would be in jail for domestic abuse (by strangulation).

Elimination challenge: prepare six family style dishes out on a farm together as one team using ingredients from the farm and produce from a traveling pantry they set up in one of the cars. What was interesting was they wouldn't know what the main ingredients were until they reached their destination. The planning stages the night before was just a pissing contest between Kenny and Angelo to see who had the biggest cock.

The contestants arrive at the farm and more bitching and whining begins. It's too cold or (gasp) they have to cook on grills or propane stoves! Have any of them ever seen an episode of Top Chef? These kinds of twists are pretty standard.

Angelo made duck for the elimination challenge, he mentions that he prepared it so well that he made love to his duck. I wonder if this kind of behavior lead to his crab infection.

Kevin, Kenny, Kelly, and Andrea were the top four for the elimination challenge with Kenny (the Beast) winning with a sweet and sour curry eggplant dish. Sounds yummy. Tim, Amanda, and Stephen were on the bottom with Tim being selected to go home. I felt Tim would be the one since he changed his dish in the middle of cooking and he's been struggling lately.

Anyone else think the judges were kind of harsh, at least Padma? I hate it when it when she gets cranky, saying things like "I would send this dish back." Great criticism. It's probably just Bravo's crappy editing.

Next week on Top Chef: The contestants get to judge each other! Sounds like a lot of fun and potentially a lot of drama, I guess I'll tune in next week.

The "Bye Felicia" award goes to Tim. He changed his dish and basically didn't do anything in the elimination challenge, good call judges. Bye Felicia.

Next chef out: going back to Stephen who is consistently on the bottom.