Loralei

My niece finally gave birth to a bouncy baby girl named Loralei on November 26th. I think most babies are usually on the ugly side especially shortly after birth but this one does seem a little sweet... or so I thought.

Anyone that knows me can tell you I have a very low threshold for children. Sure I like to torment them and terrorize them (just like my ex-boyfriends) but once I'm over them they can go away. I've never wanted kids. Ever. Period. I'm that rare breed of asshole that wants to spend his time and money on himself! That's not to say that I don't love all my nieces and nephews, it just took me 16-18 years to want to "hang" with them for more than an hour at a time.

In a moment of weakness I finally held the baby on her second night in the hospital. Four short hours later that night I was back at home reeling on my bathroom floor puking and shitting at the same time into the wee hours of the night. Coincidence? I think not. What started out that night in my bathroom (the most wretched experience I have EVER experienced) has mellowed into a weeklong offering of achiness, fever, soar throat, stuffy nose, and swollen glands. I felt so bad after work on Sunday I went directly to mom's house for some much needed titty. I returned home Tuesday night. Keep in mind that I'm 35 years old folks!

All kidding aside I think Nick and Casey have done a terrific job and I hope they have a long and wonderful life together as a family. I look forward to torturing "Lo" for many years to come as I still do to Casey, Brandy and her little beast Blaire. One thing's for sure, I won't be holding the baby any time soon just in case she really does have it out for me already!

Oh and in case you're wondering I'm not wearing a wig in the picture above, I'm just six months overdue for some Manicuring as Frank likes to say.

iTunes Top 5

Don't Cry Out - Shiny Toy Guns - 166 play count
You're Not Alone (Airplay Mix) - ATB - 159 play count
A Little Respect - Erasure - 158 play count
Go Your Own Way - The Cranberries - 153 play count
Rainy Monday - Shiny Toy Guns - 148 play count

What is everyone else listening to most often (at least on their computer)?

New Trek Trailer

The Great Promise

So I'm here feeling a little sorry for myself and this blog is the perfect place to vent since no one reads it. What the fuck happened to my life? I really did have a plan althought it might have only lasted a minute! I'm 35 years old and I've done NOTHING of any substance with my life. Oh well, life goes on.... I only wish I had the balls to NOT make it go on.

Yes we did!

Goodbye Bush! Happy days are here again!

Obama the Anti-Christ

I swiped the following post from the O-State message boards:

"This will make you re-think: A Trivia question in Sunday School:
How long is the beast allowed to have authority in Revelation?

Revelation Chapter 13 tells us it is 42 months, and you know what that is. Almost a four-year term of a Presidency.

All I can say is 'Lord, Have mercy on us!'

According to The Book of Revelation the anti-Christ is:
The anti-Christ will be a man, in his 40's, of MUSLIM descent, who will deceive the nations with persuasive language, and have a MASSIVE Christ-like appeal....the prophecy says that people will flock to him and he will promise false hope and world peace, and when he is in power, will destroy everything.

Do we recognize this description? ?

I STRONGLY URGE each one of you to post this as many times as
you can! Each opportunity that you have to send it to a friend or media outlet..do it!
I refuse to take a chance on this unknown candidate who came out of nowhere."

I got a good chuckle out of it. It's amazing the cooks floating around the internets especially in Oklahoma.

Oh Those Poor Tiger Fans!

I almost feel sorry for them... almost.

My Jury Duty Experience

Monday October 6th, 2008

8:00AM: Arrive and register
8:05AM - 10:00AM: Sit and wait
10:00AM - 10:20AM: Break
10:20AM - 12:00PM: Sit and wait
12:00PM - 1:30PM: Lunch
1:30PM - 3:00PM: Sit and wait
3:00PM - 3:20PM: Break
3:20PM - 4:30PM: Sit and wait

Tuesday October 7th, 2008

9:00AM: Arrive and register
9:05AM - 10:00AM: Sit and wait
10:00AM - 10:20AM: Break
10:20AM - 11:15AM: Sit and wait
11:16AM: Dismissed from jury duty

Wages lost from two missed shifts at work: $140.00
Money spent parking: $11.50
Lunch at Subway Monday: $6.00
Being sick during the whole ordeal: Priceless

The Election

It's all over but the crying for the McCain camp!

Shiny Toy Guns: Frozen Oceans

They'll be in town Nov. 2nd in Norman.

Joey baby...

Would you like some ranch with that?

What the fuck is the obession with ranch salad dressing? Is this an Oklahoma thing? I think not after doing some research at Bitter Waitress. Why is it that most patrons at a restaurant have to have a gallon of ranch with all food items?

"Can I get a water with lemon and a side of ranch?"
"I'll have the cheesecake for dessert with a side of ranch."
"I'd like the red snapper special along with a kiddie pool of ranch on the side."

FUCK.

One day I'll own my own restaurant and I intend to have a mini fridge at each table stocked full of FUCKING RANCH SALAD DRESSING so some poor server slob making $2.13 and hour doesn't have to run to the kitchen three hundred times a shift to get a side of ranch to go along with someone's FUCKING BURNT TO A CRISP WELL DONE STEAK WITH A-1 SAUCE!!!

Many thanks to the d-bags that have the common courtesy to request a side of ranch at the time their order is being taken! You've saved me a lot of time running my ass off for a 12% tip!

Sometimes food should be enjoyed without being slathered with salad dressing... another diet Pepsi?

New Trek Next Summer

Animal Crossing City Folk

Anyone else excited?

Heading to Louisiana for the Weekend!

I'll drunk call everyone from New Orleans!

Where have I been?

Apparently on Crystal's chest!

The Boy Who Cried Wolf

Friday I'm in Love - The Cure

Lay All Your Love on Me

Erasure covering ABBA

Drink of the Day: Wine (again)

La Crema Chardonnay

"Fresh aromas of citrus, butterscotch and lemon peel open to appealing hints of jasmine and nutmeg. On the palate, rich buttercream, pear and citrus meld to create a plush, rounded middle, with toast and caramel adding richness and texture to the long, lingering finish."

Having a glas now thanks to Kim's birthday present. I love getting wine as a present! Click here for more information.

Thanks again Kim!